A Career Girl’s Guide to Becoming a Stepmom: Expert Advice from Other Stepmoms on How to Juggle Your Job, Your Marriage, and Your New Stepkids
Posted by
brian in
Career BOOKS on
Apr 26th, 2010 |
5 responses
- ISBN13: 9780060846831
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
Product Description
You have an exciting, fulfilling job. You’ve fallen in love with the man of your dreams—and met his three kids! Now what? Jacquelyn B. Fletcher shows how any professional woman turned wife and instant stepmother can build on the skills she employs at work—organization, team-building, goal-setting, and planning—to succeed at home in her new role as stepmom. Drawing on the latest research, her own experiences, and those of other real-life stepmothers, Fletcher offers advice, hope, encouragement, and much-needed answers to common conundrums, including:
- Why don’t I have control over my own schedule?
- What kind of relationship do I want with my stepkids?
- What if I want to have a baby of my own?
- How do we create a budget that feels fair if I make more money than my husband does?
A Career Girl’s Guide to Becoming a Stepmom is essential reading for the professional woman who has it all—and then suddenly has more than she expected.
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This past fall I married a man with 2 children from a previous marriage – hence entering the world of stepmotherhood. I never ever thought I’d be here. I had spent the better majority of my life working hard to further my career and continue to find that part of my life both rewarding and very fulfilling. I knew likely I would marry – I had great interest in the companionship and lifelong partnership that would bring. But I have never had quite the same desire to be a mom, let alone a stepmom. Life has a funny way of interjecting an alternate path when you least expect it!
Since I met the kids almost 4 years ago, and knowing my relationship with their father was going to be serious, I started searching for support help and doing a lot of reading. But so much out there just never felt like it fit me…negativity, horror stories, or just basic differences – like me not bringing any kids into the equation on my side. I felt like the odd man out, and often felt more alien to stepmotherhood (or the possibility of it) than before I started reading. It is an ongoing “battle” for me. There are some days where I feel very confident in my role as stepmom. There are other days (many more than I would like to admit) where I feel out of sorts and paralyzed almost by the two kids running through my house.
But with this book my feelings were very different. I found myself affirming some of the lines with noticeable head nods and even outloud comments like “I’m not the only one” and “I knew it wasn’t just me.” It was great. It was like finding a positive, comforting and empathetic friend who spoke with candor and honesty but also with heart and passion for making stepmotherhood more welcoming, more understood, and most importantly, more valued than it often is.
So many stepmoms, especially those who bring no children of their own into the relationship, struggle to find their place with the children. And also come to terms with what this change means for them – both with their husband and with their career/independent life. My big struggle continues to be how to balance my professional life – which is probably the best it’s ever been right now – with a personal life that to some extent, I never imagined myself a part of. But slowly, each day gets better, a little easier, more comfortable. Thanks largely in part to a very strong, supportive husband.
Ms. Fletcher’s book was refreshing, positive, and very helpful. Put it at the top of your list if you are going to be involved as a stepmother, now or in the future. Few take on the topic like Jacque does.
Rating: 4 / 5
Wow! I was literally sitting at home yesterday, having a pity party about my difficulties as a stepmom, when through my tears, I remembered getting A Career Girl’s Guide to becoming a Stepmom at the library. I decided to flip through it to find words of encouragement and read the entire thing in one day! This book seemed to have been written for me: no children of my own, a career woman, dating a wonderful man with a young daughter. I love how Fletcher validates how hard it is to co-parent someone else’s child yet doesn’t let you wallow in negativity. I was inspired and motivated and highly, HIGHLY recommend this book.
Rating: 5 / 5
I am not a stepmom or a stepdaughter but my best friend is both, and I wish I had had this book when she met the man she would marry — the man with the kids from the previous marriage. There was no way for me to understand the kinds of issues she faced as they courted and got married and built their new family; this book makes it all so clear. It’s very insightful and reassuring without sugarcoating any of the rough stuff, and it gives the reader a good set of tools to help you be really proactive in your relationships. It really is a wonderful guide.
Rating: 5 / 5
This is a positive straight-forward handbook and a must-have for any woman contemplating marrying or dating a man with kids. There are so few GOOD and empowering books written for single women and this is it. I bought this book and gave it to my girlfriend who is also dating a single dad after I read it. I’ve logged on to buy another copy for myself! If you’re looking for other step-family/parenting resources I also recommend anything by Ron Deal. http://www.successfulstepfamilies.com
Rating: 5 / 5
If you’re dating or married to a man with children from a previous relationship, and if you have no children of your own, this is THE book to read. A lot of other books and resources out there are full of horror stories and doomsday predictions that left me feeling pessimistic about dating a man who has children. This book, by contrast, is hopeful and positive even while being honest about the challenges of the situation. Fletcher uses her own story, other women’s stories, and expert advice to give readers a realistic look at life as a stepmother, as well as practical advice to help stepmothers play a positive role in their new families while maintaining balance, security and fulfillment in their own lives. She prepares you for both the challenges of being a stepmom as well as the rewards and happiness that can come from falling in love with a man who has children. As you read this book, you’ll feel like you’re getting expert advice from a wise, compassionate and straight-talking friend. It’ll leave you feeling more confident and positive about your relationship and your role in your new, expanded family.
Rating: 5 / 5